A friend of mine wrote an essay that captured motherhood perfectly when she talked about wanting to "capture all the joy" that comes from raising children, but just. can't. wait. until bedtime. She wrote, "
How could I want to fast-forward, pause, and rewind all in the same breath?"
Motherhood is crazy and I'll be the first to admit that I don't do it perfectly. Randy came home today, looked around at our messy house, and before he could say anything, I interrupted with, "I raised children today." I went to Enrichment tonight (I didn't want to go, but Randy made me) and I was telling a friend that my house was a complete disaster - she didn't believe me because she was just there a few hours before. When we came home, I gave her the grand tour of my house - I showed her each room to prove to her that our home is not always in the immaculate condition that I'd like it to be. I try, and many days are a success....but some days....I fail.
Joshy is my little monster child of late. He is impossible at nap and bed time. I sat outside his bedroom today and carted him back to his bed every time he got out of it. He laughed and thought it was the funnest game ever. After 30 minutes of this, I wanted to beat him. I
prayed for alternatives to NOT BEAT HIM. An impression came. I took Josh into my arms and cradled him like a little baby. With his little body curled into a ball in my arms, I lay down in his tiny bed. He fell asleep almost instantly. I let him sleep for another ten minutes or so before I dared to leave. 40 minutes of "get it done" time wasted. Or...40 minutes of time to
enjoy motherhood. I am so lucky.
I had to document my sleeping, naughty child...